Length: 5 minutes

Christians tend to be very family oriented, which is a good thing, because we have a responsibility to our family first. But Christians also tend to think that taking joy from your physical family or friends is something of a virtue. This is simply not correct.

In our last part we laid out this principle, which carries into everything in life: “Take your joy from something that is changing, and your joy will be unstable and changing. Take your joy from something that is eternal and constant, and your joy will be eternal and constant (as it should be).” This couldn’t be clearer from this verse:

Philippians 4:4 (NKJV) Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!

The only reason why we can rejoice in the Lord always, is because He’s always the same, our relationship with Him is always the same, and every good thing He’s provided is always the same. Therefore, it’s only when we rejoice in the Lord, that we can rejoice always! If you try to rejoice in anything else, you’ll never be able to “rejoice always.” 

When it comes to our physical relationships, those are subject to change, although much of the church finds it virtuous to take their joy from their physical family or close relationships. And while unity is such an important thing (Psalms 133:1), and while we should endeavor to bless our family and keep it close knit as much as possible, if you take your joy from physical relationships, what happens when they change, or are strained? There went your joy. There went your peace. This is why, the people who take the most amount of joy from physical relationships, are also the people that are most depressed when anything changes with them. Because if you entrust your joy to something subject to change, your joy is also subject to change. It’s only when you rejoice in the Lord, and what He’s given, that you can rejoice always. 

There’s a difference between loving and blessing your family and friends, and taking your joy from them. There’s also a difference between being pleased and approving of a close-knit family, and taking your joy from it. We should all approve and endeavor to keep godly harmony in a household, but there’s quite a difference between that, and entrusting your joy to it. This is so strange to most Christians, but that’s why most Christians aren’t rejoicing when their relationships are strained in any way.

But what if we rejoice in the unity of the Spirit that we have with our believing family members? I’m only referring to your fellow believers right now, but what if we rejoiced over the fact that in Christ, we have perfect unity with our believing family? What if we rejoiced in the fact that all our names are recorded in the same book, we’ve been washed by the same Christ, and we know the voice of the same Shepherd. If you were rejoicing over the unity you had with your true family (fellow believers), you could rejoice all the time, because that is forever! That is unchanging! That is a unity that we have in Christ.

Even if your relationship with a believing family member was strained. You could still rejoice because you know that they have the same Spirit as you, and even if you have differences of opinion now, you have the same Shepherd in you to unite you in agreement again. 

You see? It’s all about rejoicing in what you have through Jesus, which is unchanging, even as it relates to your friends and family. Not rejoicing in someone simply because you have a blood relationship with them, or because everyone is outwardly getting along. Those are carnal things, subject to change. We need to be rejoicing in what Jesus has done, so that we can rejoice always. 

But what about unsaved family members or friends? Well, they may not be a part of your heavenly family right now, so you don’t have true unity with them, but even an unsaved family member gets fringe benefits from the Spirit manifesting from you (1 Corinthians 7:14)! And even unsaved people who treat you well, get fringe blessings from God (Genesis 12:3). That’s something to rejoice over! And that is something that you have now, and into all eternity. They receive from God to some degree, simply by knowing and blessing you! No one can change that and no one can take that away from you, because you have it in Christ! Not to mention the fact that, the saving knowledge of Jesus is in you to reach that person! And you have that truth always (2 John 1:2)! 

John 16:22 (NKJV) …I will see you again and your heart will rejoice, and your joy no one will take from you.

Even from experience, it seems the people that take the most joy from the acceptance, admiration, and closeness of other people, inevitably, are the people that have the lowest of lows. Their emotions seem to be on a roller coaster. But Jesus has provided something for every area of your life, including your relationships. So rather than rejoice in the outward, carnal nature of blood relatives, or whether everyone is getting along right now, why not rejoice in what Jesus has done for your relationships? 

It is only then, when you’re strictly taking your joy from what Jesus has done, that your joy will be steady. It is only then, that you’ll be able to rejoice always! Because what you have through him, is with you always. 

Matthew 28:20 (NKJV) …and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.

If this blessed you, share this with someone else. More people need to understand this awesome truth.